Gail Barker wasn’t sure the word maverick fit her. Then she sat with it for a minute and realized she has spent her whole life doing what she wants, how she wants, when she wants, and had simply never put that together before. That’s Gail. She’ll go skydiving, walk the outside ledge of the CN Tower, and then tell you the genuinely hard part was the conversation she needed to have. She’s a coach, an author, and one of those rare people who says the true thing and somehow makes it feel kind. When she saw her photos, she said it was liberating and honouring at the same time. I found out that she grew up in Thunder Bay so instantly knew why I liked her so much: she was a Northern Ontario girl like me (I grew up in Sault Ste. Marie). Here she is, in her own words.
What does being a ‘maverick’ mean to you?
When I hear maverick, I think of someone who stands apart, who does things their way, on their terms. When I first contemplated being a part of this campaign, I wasn’t entirely sure that the word fit who I am. And yet, as I reflect on my life until this point, there is a way that I have always, and I do mean always, showed up how I want, done what I want, when I want. I hadn’t really put that together before.
Tell us about a time you felt powerful, proud, or truly yourself.
I have had a few such times in my life, and the common thread in all of them is facing my fears head on. I’ve done this when I’ve applied for roles or contracts that have felt out of my comfort zone, when I’ve challenged my perceived physical limitations, or when I’ve “failed” at something and then tried again. There’s a well of courage that lives within me, and when I tap into it, the outcome always has me feel alive (whether the outcome is exactly how I want or not). My most recent feats of this nature include skydiving, doing the CN Tower EdgeWalk, and engaging in some difficult but necessary conversations.
What’s one challenge you’ve overcome that shaped who you are today?
I can’t think of a single, specific event. Instead, I think it’s been a journey of self-discovery and self-empowerment (I’m not a fan of this phrase, but it’s the most accurate). Growing up, I was anything but confident. I felt like such an outsider in so many places and experiences. Like many folks, I tried to “fit in”, often at the cost of my true self. Over time, I’ve learned that fitting in and “belonging” are two very different things. While the little girl in me still longs to “fit in” from time to time, I now find myself worrying less about that, and sourcing spaces where I truly belong, which is such a better way for me to live.
What’s something most people don’t know about you, but should?
I’m much more of an introvert than an extrovert!! I know that I can be loud and rambunctious and outgoing, I know I can appear really confident and comfortable on stages of all sorts. And, truly, at the end of the day I am one who savours solitude (different from loneliness, to be clear); I love silence and being with my thoughts. Not only do I love these things, I actually need them to stay recharged! (There’s a really good chance that I’m an ambivert, one who swings between the two spaces, but the bottom line is that I am not as extroverted as many might think.)
What legacy are you building or living?
Legacy, such a BIG concept. When it comes down to it, I believe that people will remember me for two things.
First, the importance of living whole-hearted lives. In a world that puts so much emphasis on achievement, and work, and being busy, I actually take a stand for living more fully and wholly. I’m not sure that “going above and beyond” at work, for example, is all that it’s cracked up to be if, at the end of the day, you don’t have time for the other things that matter to you. Brené Brown says that “it takes courage to say yes to rest and play in a society that views exhaustion as a status symbol.” I think she’s bang on with that one.
Second, diversity, equity, inclusion. These are so much more than what gets conveyed in a simple, neat acronym (DEI). As evolved as humans believe themselves to be, we haven’t yet reached the stage collectively of being able to accept and celebrate differences in meaningful ways. A big piece of my own growth, learning and work happens in this space. If I could teach the next generation of humans one thing, it would be to really learn about each other, so that we can all live together in harmony. I don’t think that’s idealistic; I think it’s what’s needed for humanity to truly thrive.
What message would you share with other women who are still finding their voice or their confidence?
There’s a line in the book “Pillars of the Earth” by Ken Follett: “excessive pride is a familiar sin, but a (person) may just as easily frustrate the will of God through excessive humility.”
What I know for sure is that historically, women in particular have been praised for humility and all that goes with that, including playing small. It’s time to lose that thinking. Honour your internal wisdom over the chatter of the world around you. Every time you hear yourself saying “I don’t know”, ask yourself, what if you do? There is an essence within you that absolutely DOES know that answer, no matter the question. Trust that.
How did you feel seeing yourself in this portrait experience? What shifted for you?
There was something quite liberating and simultaneously honouring about the experience. I was reminded that who I am is absolutely enough! And who I am is powerful. It’s one thing to sense that; it’s another to see it and feel it. This experience was such a great way to reconnect with the core of me.
If you could describe yourself in three words today, what would they be?
Open-hearted; truth-teller; compassionate.
These, I think, speak to the core of who I am and how I show up. Each has a strength and a shadow to it; I strive to live into the strength and notice when I’m slipping into shadow, and shift accordingly.
(And I’ll add “growing” as a fourth word, because I’m a bit of a rule-breaker at times, and I am, in fact, always growing.)
Find Gail
Gail is the founder of Stellar Coaching & Consulting and the author of What Matters Now: Lessons on Living with Ease. If she resonated with you, here’s where to find her.
- Stellar Coaching & Consulting: stellarcc.com
- Her book, What Matters Now: Lessons on Living with Ease: available at Indigo
- LinkedIn: linkedin.com/in/gailbarker
- Substack, Thinking Out Loud: substack.com/@gailbarkerthinkingoutloud
Our collaborative partners:
- Hair & Makeup: Samantha Blatnicky Makeup + Lash Artist · @samanthablatnicky · samanthablatnicky.com
- Amanda Hair Artist · instagram.com
Location: Anita Watkins Photography, London, Ontario
